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Stranger
I wish I could speak to her without getting upset, but I just can’t because of all the things that come out of her mouth. My whole body feels like it’s on fire, and that’s why anytime I begin to talk, it sounds like I’m fighting. I’m not trying to compete with the woman who… — read more
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Precious Moment
People would say that the hardest thing for any woman is knowing that something is growing and moving inside. It has been a fantastic experience to feel that a piece of her moves inside of her, letting her mom know that she is very much alive and ready to take this crazy journey together. The… — read more
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Angry
It’s been a minute since I have put my thoughts on paper or my laptop because the best writing is when I can feel it and make others feel what I’m going through. Here I’m pouring out my heart again. My mother feels like I’m ungrateful for everything she does for me or that I… — read more
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A mother’s heart
She was not planned but not unwanted, just a real surprise from God itself. Even though she never developed into her little person, I was lucky enough to feel her heartbeat next to mine. So we were bonded way before you became my little girl angel. As my first & only baby girl, I have… — read more
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Could you not see me as your daughter?
Mom, I am not coming to you like your daughter, but like the woman I am. I understand that seeing me as anything more than a woman is difficult because you probably thought we would not make it this far, but you and I are here. The place that I find myself with her is… — read more
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Bloodline
I don’t know if we have ever had a mother and daughter relationship where I could be myself and not fear your reaction about anything that might come out of my mouth. I am with pen and paper, hoping that you may see me through my words since you struggle to see who I am… — read more
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Makeover
Giving my room a makeover isn’t going to help me emotionally. Yeah, my room would look beautiful because it does need a facelift. It’s funny how she can come out of her face and says that she is disappointed in me, but what about the disappointment I hold inside about how I feel like a… — read more
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Single Mother’s
(I have no idea what it’s like to be a single mom, but I feel like they need recognition for all their hard work and sacrifice.) A mother’s job begins when she decides that she is ready to share her life with another human being grown inside of her—not knowing that they will be growing… — read more
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Letting Go
I am not a parent, but I am struggling to let go because I am the baby of my family, and most importantly, I have nothing but limitations that my disability places on my everyday life. I understand that it is difficult for a parent to see their children leave the nest for a parent,… — read more
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Live for Yourself
The biggest challenge I have for myself is knowing that nobody Else’s opinion matters but my own. No one else’s opinion should matter because I am the one that has to live with my decisions; no one else does, and no one else has to understand why I made the decisions I made. Having the… — read more
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Growth & Change
People change in many ways because they go through those changes; two things can happen; people can grow together or grow apart. Some growth has to happen within ourselves, so we may know what kind of direction our lives should be taking. Change is letting go of those things and even those who stunt growth… — read more
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Dreamcatcher
Today was one of those days people can & should only dream about in my mind. It was amazingIn incredibleUnforgettableI lived every moment for what it was & not worry about tomorrow like most people choose to live.All eyes are on me because of me & my dreams. Dreams come true as long as I… — read more
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Build In Fighter
Learning who we are as a person doesn’t give others the right to define who We should be. Strength doesn’t always mean physical strength; power is also understanding, or coming to terms with enough is enough. If we can’t please ourselves in all areas of our lives, why would we please others in all possible… — read more
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Everyone has a voice
I’m a voice in this world. As a voice in this world, I have the right to stand up for wrongful things. If I silence myself or allow myself to be quiet, anyone will fall into being one of those who are afraid to stand up for anything. I’m a voice in this world and… — read more
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Unselfish Loved
She held this little human being in her belly, giving them a chance. She held this tiny human in her stomach, allowing them to bond and have an opportunity to become one soul with each other. Nine months to watch and feel something growing inside of her, she is a fantastic feeling for anyone who… — read more
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Damn
Damn, I am 38 years old, and I am not usually the one that handles it that this damn wheelchair or the fact that you had to give up your own life to take care of me because my damn disability won’t allow me to be as independent as I would love to be. Yes,… — read more
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Fly By
Anytime I have time to look back on things that happen in my life, I feel like I did not get the chance to enjoy what I had because all I was doing was flying by, so there was no real-time see.Flying by is another way I deal with my feelings and thoughts simply because… — read more
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LABEL
LABELS ARE THINGS THAT HELP DESCRIBE PEOPLE, PLACES &I DON’T BELIEVE ANYONE SHOULD BE LABEL.WHEN ANYONE CAN WALK AROUND LABELING OTHER PEOPLE SO EASILY, IT’S BECAUSE THEY ARE FEAR OF THE UNKNOWN.PUTTING LABELS ON PEOPLE WILL NEVER HELP US BECOME ONE; IT WILL JUST KEEP US DIVIDE.It’s TIME TO STOP ALLOWING THESE DIFFERENT LABELS TO… — read more
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A Child
I’m a child of no gender.I’m a child of no color.I’m a child who was taught to love everyone.I’m a child that was told to be who you want to be, no matter what anyone else might have to say.I’m a child of freedom of expression.I’m a child who is gay & proud of it.I’m… — read more
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The race of life
I am running one of the craziest races against myself because I want to know how far I can go before my body says no more.I want to push myself on and beyond, but sometimes it seems impossible because time seems always to be running out, and I am left feeling like I could have… — read more
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Tomorrow
Tomorrow is not what we live today. Today is not what we live tomorrow. Let’s live the moment and stop trying to make something out of nothing. Make no promises because life is a gift from God that is taken away without reason or explanation.Ms. Butterfly Genesis🇩🇴 — read more
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Uniquely
I was born this way.Just because I look different does not mean anyone has the right to bully me.I believe that God made me different because he knew I was uniqueMaybe I was born this way because I’m supposed to teach others; it’s the best thing in the world when we don’t look like everyone… — read more
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My miracle
She never thought she would ever hear the heartbeat of the little miracle growing inside of her.Her body never worked well enough to know if she would ever have a little one that I could look just like her.The only time she felt like her body would not fail her was when she placed all… — read more
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Tired
I am tired of crying.I am tired of looking like I’m trash.Tired of taking and not being able to throw back because that’s who I am.I am tired of being that person who everyone runs over because of it so damn easy.Just tired of being the one who tries to belong when, in reality, no… — read more
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Stop Listening
Stop listening behind my walls.If there is something, you would like to know to open up communication with me.I’m a woman of my actions, and I have also taken responsibility for every step in my life.Stop listening behind these walls, and assuming that you have heard will help you figure out what’s going on in… — read more
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Fake ass
I am hiding myself to please others who have nothing or have never had anything to do with my life.It makes me angry that there are so many people against me when I have done nothing but forget about myself as a person so I may have the chance to be there for those I… — read more
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Hate On Me
Judge me when you have become a god.Judge me when you have walked a mile in my shoes.Judge me when you have facts, not on things you have made up in the head. I might not be your flavor, but I have been that flavor that many have enjoyed in their lifetime. I might look… — read more
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My Body
Hating our bodies is wrong because we have always been made to believe that our bodies are our temple. Yes, I agree that my body is a temple, so I should respect it; maybe if I had a somewhat working body where I may do more things independently away from getting assistance all the time.Then… — read more
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Disabled on the Street
Disabled people are human beings & as human beings, we have earned the same or little more rights than people on two good legs.So how come the majority of the homeless people on the streets are disabled?I believe it’s because no matter how much time passes, people will never give us the spot we deserve… — read more
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Muscular walls
Even the most muscular walls have ways of breaking down. I’ve always been loved as a strong person because I don’t let things bother me or affect most people. Today was a story for the history books. For the first time, I had no idea how to be strong or if I could be substantial.My… — read more
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Failing System
I’m living on a system that is failing me every single day that goes by.By telling me that as much as I am fighting for my independence, I will never have it because all I am to this system is money in someone’s pockets.The system is clueless on what it takes to be me. Every… — read more
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Untimely
How does she stop being a burden to others? I don’t want to be a burden, and I don’t even want to feel like a burden, but I do. I’m not sure if people understand how much I hate depending on others for every little thing that I desire to do independently. I’ve always seen… — read more
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Independence
Everyone with a disability looks for independence in many different ways.One way I am looking for my freedom is by having my place where I can call home.It’s hard for someone with a disability to find a place to call home because many apartments are not build up for people with different abilities. That shows… — read more
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The Grip Is Tight
I live in a place where everything gets done for me from the time I open my eyes until I close my eyes to sleep. Many people reading this would be like, I am living the life many wish they could live. I only complain about my life because I have a beautiful mother who… — read more
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Determination
Someone asked me am I completely comfortable with who I am? Honestly, I always find myself saying yes because I know that’s what people expect me to say, but I struggle, in all honesty.I struggle with the ability to be comfortable with myself because my family, in a lot of ways, has never made me… — read more
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I rolled in my wheelchair
To understand how someone lives, you have to live in their shoes before passing judgment on their lives.Everyone thinks that I don’t worry about everything because I have around-the-clock care. After all, it is taken care of.That is far from the truth.One of my biggest worries is when my aide doesn’t come to work because… — read more
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Breonna Taylor
She is Breonna Taylor, a black woman who had no idea that the last time she went to bed would be the last time she would be alive.She went to bed, not knowing that she would be murdered. Breonna Taylor is and should not be just a name. She should be a moment for change… — read more
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Colorists
If people asked me how I see myself, I would have to say I see myself as a human being; my skin color should not define. It’s sad and difficult to believe that as a country, we are still being looked at by the color of our skin and nothing more, and what’s even worse… — read more
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Reliving
I saw what I wanted to see.I felt things that I never thought I could feel again.The best feeling I have been able to feel in a long time is that school girl crush.I could smile without someone making me feel like I should not be.Texting for hours gave me a reason never to go… — read more
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Heart Giveway
Someone, please give her the cure for love.She is desperate to find a cure to love because if she doesn’t try and find a cure for this damn thing called love, she will die a slow death over having no remedy for love.Love can and should be a fantastic thing when people are in it… — read more
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Resurface
She prayed for many years for the ability to make peace with a part of her life.She felt that she would never make peace with it because it was never the right time or place in her life. When she least expected it, her prayer of making peace came true because that part of her… — read more
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You better
You better tell her that you love me.You better tell her the nights you don’t come home is because you are home with me.She needs to know that karma is slapping her in the face like it once did me.Ms. Butterfly Genesis — read more
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No guarantees
I want to love.I want to make sure that you will be there to catch me if I fall in love.When we take the chance to fall in love, there’s no guarantee that there will be someone there to catch you when you fall, but when you have suffered so many heartbreaks, People begin to… — read more
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Partnership
She wants a partner. She wants a partner that she can grow with and know that she can be herself.She wants a partner that shares the same common goal as a Couple.She wants an encouraging partner to see the best in her when she can’t see in herself.She wants a partner to love and fight… — read more
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The Cover-up
Love is patient.Love is understanding.Love is growing together and becoming one.Love is fighting and knowing when it’s time to let go.Love is a four-letter word that should not be used as a Band-Aid to cover up underneath the surface that abuses the word love.Ms. Butterfly Genesis — read more
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Temporary
Temporary people always find a way to teach you long-term lessons. Temporary people are not meant to be long-term people, no matter how bad we would like to make them long-term people. Temporary people can give us what we want for the moments or make us live unforgettable moments that we may never be able… — read more
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inter-able relationship
Inter-able relationships are not something people discuss because it’s strange for many to see a disabled person with a non-disabled person. I have been on both sides of the spectrum of dating non-disabled people and dating people with disabilities. I could honestly say that I had more stares with the non-disabled person than with a… — read more
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Unattractive
Let me start by saying I’m not a relationship expert, but I was having a conversation with one of my girlfriends, and she inspired me to put this piece together. Just remember what I said in the first line; I’m not a relationship expert. I’ve been in good and bad relationships to know that no… — read more
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Love
I wish I could run, but where would I hide.I would love to hide from my heart because my heart has the bad habit of playing tricks on me.I don’t want tricks because it’s difficult to see the magic in love when love has a hard time showing its true self to me to give… — read more
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Valentine’s Day
Valentine’s Day is the date of showing love to that special someone in your life. No one should need a day like Valentine’s Day to say I love you to someone or need such a date to show people how you feel about them. Every Day is a chance for someone to tell that person… — read more
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A Far
I loved as hard as I could.I also enjoy every moment for what it was, not for what I tried to make it.I never questioned how far we could have made it if we had done right by each other.We could have made it farther than those who were waiting for us to fail.We had… — read more
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flaws
When we decide to make changes in our lives, we have to make sure we are doing it for the right reason, but most importantly, we are doing it for ourselves. The change should only happen when we need to improve ourselves or see something we might not like ourselves. We should never change who… — read more
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Heart
The heart has a mind of its own & no one should ever go against whatever the heart might feel because the heart wants what it wants. We as people hate being controlled by things & people &; her heart is no exception. Her head is quick to say no more like nothing, but the… — read more
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Open Heart
Invisible unheard unseen unwanted unneeded Unloved These are all the feelings that I feel anytime I feel ignored by anyone around me, or maybe it’s just all in my head. I’m not looking for sympathy or pity, but I want some acknowledgment that I’m here. Maybe it’s my fault for feeling how I do because… — read more
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Blind
Blind no more. I‘m no longer using my heart to see anyone for who they are and their real purpose in my life. My eyes showed me that the person I have been looking at was a smoking mirror. I struggled to see through the fog what I thought was real and wanted them to… — read more
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No Settling
She does not confuse the physical relationship with love. Yes, a physical relationship is a part or should be part of any healthy relationship between a man or a woman. The most crucial element to any good relationship is love, respect, honor, loyalty, honesty, and friendship. Without any of these things, it would be challenging… — read more
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No more love
I don’t want to fall in love.When I fall in love, I fall in hard.By loving as hard as I do, I’m able to love him with his scars, even with the broken heart he walked in.I don’t want to fall in love because I forget who I am anytime I find myself in love.Ms.… — read more
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Testing Love
She Will never know what real love is until she is willing to test it.Testing love by arguing and knowing that we will be saying I love you by the end.Testing love is compromising & understand that when we compromise, not one person won over the other, but what it means is their growth within… — read more
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Love
I love hard.I love fearless.I love with strength.I love with faithfulness.I love knowing that love can conquerors all as long as we will put our best foot forward.Love is used as a band-aid to cover those things we don’t want to show.If we are not willing to love without conditions, then we can not enjoy… — read more
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Conflicted
My heart hurts always, and the sad part is no one realizes it. I want to stop mistreating. But I need to stop hurting most of all. There are so many things causing me pain right now. It’s hard to pinpoint which one is causing me more pain. Is it the fact that he is… — read more
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The Gift
The most fantastic part of any woman is how she can use her body to bring new life into this crazyworld that we are all a part of. What has been bugging me about being a life-givers is that we as woman don’t appreciate the factthat God blessed us as a woman to have the… — read more
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Mommy & Daddy
Daddy and I always think about who you would’ve been and who you would’ve become. As long as I have a clear mind, I’m still going to think about the day I decided not to give you life because of my selfish reasons and his maturity. I always think about if we were ready to… — read more
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The Heartbeat
The heartbeat was a gift from God himself. The heartbeat that would change my life because that’s when I understood a tiny human lived insideof me. The moment your heartbeat came through, we became this unbreakable team because we neededeach other from that day forward. Now that you are here, I can’t believe that I… — read more
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Only God Knows
Can we start over? If we do start over, how do we even know where to begin. Those questions can & only be answered by God as long as we place our faith in him. Anytime something happens to alter our lives, trust that God has a lesson that needs him to teach inhis way… — read more
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Religion
Religion is known as the higher power to believe in. Faith. Strength. Peace. Unconditional love. Excepting. Forgiveness. Understanding. I don’t have to go into a church to believe in God or know that God is real. God is everywhere, as long as we believe in him and in his actions. Please don’t question my faith;… — read more
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How many Times
How many of us say that we won’t look back? Not looking back is because how can anyone grow when we are busy looking back for something we believe is missing. Missing it because we never got what we deserved from the person we thought we should have arrived. I guess that’s the main reason… — read more
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Trial & Error
I’ve been going through some changes in myself; a wrong decision has me questioning myself, but I don’t want anybody to pity me because I don’t need anybody to help me. So I’m going to deal with the hand I was sold.Unfortunately, trial & Error is something that happens throughout life.But, to find that special… — read more
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Body Shaming
Hoe is a disrespectful word.It’s a word to describe a woman that has no self-respect for themselves. I’m the complete opposite of a scraper. I respect myself cause I’m not throwing myself to the highest bitterness about getting anything I want. I define who I’m as a woman. I believe my clothes and consent of… — read more
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I deserve
I know what I deserve.I deserve respect.I deserve to be a queen.I deserve understanding.I DESERVE YOUR ATTENTION.I deserve support.I deserve love.If you can’t check one of those things on my list, you will not be worthy of my time. So until then, I will continue to feed myself those things on my list until someone… — read more
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Dear Self
She wants to speak for herself through my own words, but no real clue how to do so because she has blocked herself from emotionally feeling anything. She has become terrified. To scratch open those feelings can be overwhelming, and who knows if she can handle the aftermath. She struggles with writing to herself because… — read more
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Thank You
Thank YouThank you for loving me.Thank you for pulling me apart when you did.Thank you for allowing me to find the strength within myself that I thought I never had. Because of the man you were in life, I am the woman who I’m today. The woman I am today is.StrongSmartIndependent,I also understand that falling… — read more
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Inadequate
WrongdoingWho has not done them, and the one thing that follows behind that is a big sorry, so only a few days later, the cycle would repeat itself like nothing ever happened.He was tired of hearing the words I’m sorry, and she was tired of being inadequate.She was clueless about what else she could be… — read more
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Tough Ties
Our relationship has become like an ocean filled with weaves that keep going up and down.She got herself pinned against some rocks hoping to try to find a way to unpin herself, but how can she free herself?How can she attach her heart to any of these weaves that have her pinned against these rocks?The… — read more
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What is it going to do for me?
When are others going to think of me?I have always talked a great game about how I’m a grown-ass woman and always do things my way.I’m only living my half-truth, and that truth is that I’m grown, but I’m continually thinking of other feelings and happiness.I ignore my happiness and the things that I need… — read more
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Unhappiness
She understands happiness & love don’t come from a man but her loving herself first. She also understands that she must value who she is, including all her flaws. She is unhappy with herself at this point because she is too busy running from herself. After all, she is scared about what she needs from… — read more
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Pen & paper
It’s been a while since I have taken pen to paper to say how I feel. I made it to my 35th birthday with more blessings & love than a girl handle, but I made it.God heard when I said I was not ready to go anywhere yet. Every day I open my eyes; it… — read more
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The rebirth of Ms. Butterfly
People shut me down, Ms. Butterfly, for a While, not because I’m afraid of losing anything but because I have respect enough not to involve anyone with nothing to do with what he and I use to be. I swear on everyone I love and loved that the rebirth of Ms. ButterfIy will happen again,… — read more
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Passion, not a job
Blogging is just like home because it’s the only place where I can become one with myself.When I write, I write from the only real place I have, which is my heart. Sometimes I fear what will come out of my heart because I know my heart has no filter. With no filter, I have… — read more
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Blogging
I love knowing that I can write my feelings away on paper. I have never claimed to be a professional writer, but I have a passion for it because it lives in my heart. When I have a blank sheet of paper, it’s like a place for my heart to open up without judgment. The… — read more
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Non-verbal
When I write, people know about me because I speak about things I’ve gone through and have conversations with people who inspire me to write the things I put together. I’m not ashamed of anything I’ve ever posted because it comes from within me, not anyone else. I may not always write correctly, but I… — read more
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Who is a writer?
Who is a writer? What makes someone a real writer? Is someone who has been writing for years? Is someone who has made it on the bestseller list? Please don’t tell me I am not a writer because people have never seen any of the words I have put my heart into published anywhere important.… — read more
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Just Me
Hi, my name is Erika M. SantanaMy brother & I were born on 09/04/81 Besides being the youngest of four older siblings, we were born with cerebral palsy, which meant that our brain didn‘t get enough oxygen to many different parts of our minds during childbirth. I have always been told that I was the… — read more
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