The Memoir Of Ms. Butterfly

Anytime I think about the last time you and I spoke anytime, I think about the last time you and I said, Your voice becomes haunting to me because I had no idea that that would be the last time I would ever hear your voice, your laughter.

Like the rest of the world, I usually think things we have so much time to do or say how we truly feel about someone until we don’t have that time.

I thought we had more time to talk to me around each other I have plain old fun, but I was surprised that you were cheated out of seeing your boy’s become men.

Even though I shouldn’t be mad with God, I should be thanking him for allowing me to have met you and being grateful to have gotten the chance to have what I never thought would be our last girl talk.

It’s been unbearable to deal with the pain or wrap my head around the fact that you’re not here, and it’s been years already. You would think that I would have a better way of coping with it already, but in reality, I don’t. I miss my girl chat; we had so many plans.

As much as I would love to walk around with a sad face, the thought of you coming into my mind, I can’t. I know that’s not something you would want me to do anytime I think of you and bring a smile to my face and ring the whole flood of conversations that you and I had throughout the years that we’ve known each other and that we’ve been a part of each other’s lives.

It feels fantastic when I can speak about you in the present tense, like if you were just on some vacation. So, you’re coming back soon because that’s what it feels like to me, you on this long-ass vacation, and eventually, I will see you again, and I hope and pray that your ass excited as I would be when I see you again.

Life has been rough without you and what I hate the most is I can’t pick up the phone and call you and talk to you about what’s going on; you would be surprised, but then again, you wouldn’t be surprised if that makes sense. So, hopefully, they’ll see you as you’re reading this from heaven.

Time hasn’t made anything easier but any of us, but I can only speak for myself. I miss you like hell, and I can’t keep telling them on a piece of paper how much I miss you and not be able to say to you physically how much I miss you because they’re up in heaven looking down at the mess that world as becoming since you have been gone.

There are not many ways I can tell you that I miss you, but I do miss you like crazy part of me is jealous that you’re not here, and then the other part of me is glad that you’re not here because you’re no longer in pain and you’re finally resting.

I know I would be one of Many always telling me I need to take it easy, take better care of myself.

Stop doing this, stop doing that, and the only thing you tell me is I will rest the day I die.

I will get so pissed at you because I wanted you here forever, But I know then nothing is forever, and no one is supposed to be here forever, but you’re just one of those people besides my lovely grandmother that I wish could’ve stayed here forever.

I miss you, big head, most of all. I miss the girl chat. I will always love you; love this is not a word love is an Emotion, and I’m grateful that you loved me the way you did and accepted me even with my craziness.

I love you.

Ms. Butterfly Genesis